Rethinking Goal Setting: A Compassionate Approach to Creating Change
Rethinking Goal Setting: A Compassionate Approach to Creating Change
Written by Lily Thrope
Setting goals can feel exciting, overwhelming, or even intimidating. Many of us jump into goal setting with high expectations, only to feel discouraged if we don’t meet them perfectly. But goal setting doesn’t have to be rigid or punishing, it can actually be healing, empowering, and deeply aligned with your values when approached with the right mindset.
One of the most powerful tools for intentional goal setting is journaling. Writing things down connects your thoughts, your body, and your emotions in a way that makes your goals feel more tangible and possible. When your goals live only in your head, they can feel fleeting or unclear. But when you put pen to paper, your vision gains structure and a sense of commitment.
Why Journaling Supports Goal Setting
Journaling isn’t just about writing down “what you want to do.” It’s about creating a supportive dialogue with yourself as you move toward change. Some benefits include:
Clarity: Writing helps you move from vague wishes (“I want to feel healthier”) to specific goals (“I want to feel stronger and more energized, so I’ll commit to three movement sessions a week that I actually enjoy”).
Accountability: When you record your goals, progress, and reflections, you can return to those words later for encouragement and motivation.
Emotional Release: Journaling gives you space to process frustrations, fears, or self-doubt that come up along the way, so they don’t derail your progress.
Confidence & Self-Reliance: Tracking small wins helps you see that you are capable, which builds trust in yourself.
Try this prompt: “What goal have I been carrying in my mind but haven’t yet given myself permission to write down? What would shift if I put it on paper today?”
Using a Goal Planner or Journal
A structured goal-setting journal or planner can make this process even more intentional. With guided prompts, you’re encouraged to explore not just the “what” of your goals, but also the “why” and the “how.”
Some benefits of a guided journal include:
Stress Relief: Organizing your thoughts on paper helps reduce anxiety and overwhelm.
Course Correction: Prompts encourage reflection when things don’t go as planned, so you can shift with compassion instead of abandoning your goal.
Tracking Growth: Looking back on earlier entries can be incredibly motivating, you’ll see how much you’ve evolved since you began.
Pro tip: Choose a journal that feels inspiring to you. Do you like colorful pages? Minimalist layouts? A bullet journal for maximum customization? The right journal should feel like something you’ll actually want to pick up every day.
Setting Goals That Align With Your Values
One of the biggest pitfalls in goal setting is chasing goals that don’t truly belong to us. Sometimes we set goals because of external pressure, what we think we “should” do, or what others expect of us. Journaling helps you check in with your values so your goals reflect what actually matters to you.
For example: If your value is connection, maybe your health goal isn’t about a number on the scale but about having the energy to enjoy activities with friends.
Try this prompt: “What value do I want my goal to reflect? How will achieving this goal support the life I want to create?”
Practicing Self-Compassion in the Process
No goal-setting journey is without challenges. There will be days you feel motivated and days when you don’t. The key is practicing flexibility and self-compassion.
Allow yourself to adjust goals if they no longer serve you.
Celebrate progress, no matter how small.
Ask for support if you feel stuck, you don’t have to do it alone.
Remember: goals aren’t just about achievement, they’re about growth. Every step you take toward alignment with your values is meaningful progress.
Goal setting isn’t about perfection, it’s about creating a pathway toward the life you want, while staying kind to yourself along the way. By combining journaling, self-reflection, and compassion, you can make goal setting less stressful and more empowering.
If you’d like more support in exploring your values and creating meaningful goals, our team at Thrope Therapy is here to help. Schedule a free 15-minute consultation today and take the first step toward change.
